Fairly Odd Klaine
by StrawberrySterek
Summary: Finn Hudson absolutely hates his babysitter Santana. He hates his life, his school, everything. His whole life is turned around though when two men enter his life: two fairies named Kurt and Blaine. ON HIATUS.
1. Meet the Godparents

FAIFinn stormed upstairs to his room, yelling over his shoulder at his babysitter Santana "I WISH YOU WOULD STOP TREATING ME LIKE A BABY!"

Santana seemed unfazed by this, retorting back with incredible speed and cunning "And I wish you weren't a whiney little slob with two left feet and weird puffy pyramid nipples. But we can't all get what we want. Go to bed, Frankentween."

Finn slammed his door shut and leaned back against it, fighting back tears. He hated Santana and wanted nothing more than to get away from her. He closed his eyes and hid his face in his knees, crying very softly so Santana wouldn't hear.

Just as soon as Finn had started crying, a quiet pop sounded in the room. Finn ignored it, assuring himself that it was just the air conditioner. He curled up tighter, his thoughts wandering from Santana to Rachel (his on and off crush) to how awkward being 10 years old was.

"Oh, you poor baby... Kurtie's gonna make you feel better, don't worry."

Finn yelped and looked up at the unfamiliar voice. He gasped when he laid eyes on a man with chestnut brown hair and bright blue eyes floating in the middle of the room. Wait, floating...?

Finn stared at the man and saw small wings on his back, a crown on his head, and a wand in his hand. Finn covered his mouth and stared. The man smiled and waved his dainty fingers at Finn. "My name is Kurt, and this is Blaine," he said, indicating to the empty space next to him. The man ("Kurt," Finn quickly corrected himself) suddenly looked annoyed and crossed his arms. "Blaine!"

"Oh, geez, was that my cue? I'm sorry, gimme a sec," another voice said, seeming to be coming from out of nowhere. Finn had no idea what to say or do as Kurt floated there gracefully, staring at the spot where "Blaine" should be.

As soon as Kurt called his name again, another man appeared next to him, with honey eyes and neatly gelled black hair. He raised a triangular shaped eyebrow at Finn and looked at Kurt. "This is our new godchild? Seriously?"

"Blaine," Kurt warned, reaching out and grabbing Blaine's hand. "We have to be nice and make a good impression."

Blaine seemed to understand and floated over to Finn, settling down next to him.

Finn scrambled away, never taking his eyes off the two strange men. "What do you want from me? I'll give you money, food, clothes, anything, just don't hurt me! SANTA-"

Before Finn could finish calling out to his only means of escape, Kurt flicked his wand and a strip of duct tape was across Finn's mouth, stopping his speech.

"Finn, sweetheart, listen to me," Kurt urged, sitting next to Finn on his right while Blaine sidled over and sat to Finn's left. Finn looked at both of them, not sensing any possible threat they may possess.

"Honey," Kurt began, already using pet names to calm Finn down further, "we're here to help. Let me show you. If you could have anything in the world right now, what would it be. Anything."

The tape was suddenly gone from Finn's mouth as he answered "Pizza."

Blaine suddenly burst into laughter. When he calmed down a bit, he held up his wand. "You have to say 'I wish I had pizza.' and make sure you're very specific."

Finn took a breath and said slowly "I wish I had a large pepperoni pizza."

Both men waved their wands and with a loud pop, there was a box of pizza floating in front of Finn's face. Finn hesitantly grabbed a slice and bit into it. He smiled wide as the warm cheese touched his tongue. Blaine and Kurt watched quietly, both with loving smiles on their faces. Finn finished his slice of pizza and looked at Kurt. "I'm not poisoned or anything now, am I?"

Blaine laughed and shook his head. "No," Kurt said with a smile. "We're your fairy godfathers, we'd never do anything to hurt you."

"Intentionally," Blaine cut in, helping himself to a slice of Finn's pizza.

"Blaine Devon Hummel-Anderson!" Kurt yelled, waving his wand. Suddenly, a large muzzle was on Blaine's mouth. Blaine whimpered like a dog and clawed at the muzzle, apparently unaware that he had a wand he could use to poof it away.

"So, wait, you're my fairy godfathers, right?" Finn confirmed, wiping off his mouth. Kurt waved his wand and there was a napkin, dabbing gently at Finn's mouth and cleaning it off. Finn let it, waiting until it disappeared to talk again. "Can I wish for anything?"

"Almost," Kurt said, flicking his wand toward Finn. A soft poof later, there was a pink and purple book resting in Finn's lap, with "DA RULES" printed on the cover. Finn thumbed through the pages, noticing a bunch of pictures of a particular boy with brown hair and buck teeth.

"'Timmy Turner,' who's that?" Finn asked Kurt, looking over at Blaine who was still struggling with the muzzle. "Wait, first, I wish the muzzle was off Blaine."

Kurt sighed and pointed his wand half-heartedly at Blaine. As soon as the muzzle was gone, Blaine tackled Finn in a hug and kissed his cheek. "Thank you! Maybe you're not such a bad kid after all!"

Finn raised an eyebrow but couldn't help but smile. "Now, about that Turner kid...?"

Kurt got a distasteful look on his face. "He almost completely exposed all fairies and endangered us to never have godchildren again. The child we were assigned to before you, Sue, was stubborn but we loved her. We eventually had to leave her on her own for a few weeks because of Timmy Turner."

Finn frowned and looked down. "So, I'm just another kid in a constant cycle? You didn't even pick me, you were assigned to me? Am I just another pit stop on the way to the next one?" Finn asked, genuine pain etched in his eyes. Kurt softened dramatically and shifted closer to Finn, draping his arms across Finn's shoulders and kissing his cheek.

"Finny, no, that's not it at all. You're our godchild and we love you so much. One of the reasons fairies are assigned to godchildren is to provide love and affections to someone because they normally can't. For Blaine and I, being gay, chances of finding godchildren are slim and the chances we do get are few and far between. We were ecstatic when we got assigned to you, you're our child and we love you like you're our own son."

Blaine nodded in agreement, looping a comforting arm around Finn's waist. Finn smiles at the men and nuzzled down between them without thinking. "This is great. I've never had a dad and now I get two."

Blaine smiled and ruffled Finn's hair affectionately. "Kurt's more of a mother actually."

Kurt warningly raised his wand at Blaine. "Don't make me put that muzzle back. Finn's not gonna help you this time, is he, Finn?"

Finn shook his head, shrugging when Blaine gave him a heartbroken look. Blaine pouted and floated upward, settling in the air and just like that, POOF, he was gone.

"B-Blaine?" Finn called out, looking over to where Kurt had just sat, but he was gone too. Finn started to panic, looking around the room for his new friends. His eyes finally came to rest in the corner of the room, where two bright orange goldfish swam around in a bowl. One of them looked up at Finn with warm honey brown eyes, winking before returning to swimming around. The other fish, slightly paler than the first and with blue eyes, swam over to where Finn stood and butted his head against the glass, saying softly "We'll always he right here or with you, Finn. We'll only leave when- you know what, read the rules. And we'll talk about it later."

Finn nodded and washed Blaine swim around. Kurt smiled and blew a kiss at Finn. "I love you. Goodnight, honey."

"Goodnight Kurt," Finn replied, watching Kurt and Blaine swim into a small castle in the fishbowl. He settled on the bed with the rule book, reading each page carefully with growing interest. He eventually nodded off, in the middle of a story about Poof, the most recent and last fairy baby to ever be born. Finn decided he might wanna change that as he drifted off, hand resting comfortably next to Kurt and Blaine's fishbowl.


	2. Choking isn't fun

The next morning (Saturday), Finn woke up and looked over to his right. He found two bright orange goldfish there, swimming around. He smiled and tapped gently on the glass. Both fish swam to where Finn was and held up their wands. Suddenly, Kurt and Blaine were there, floating above the bed and smiling at Finn. "Good morning sweetie," Kurt said, smiling at Finn.

A huge smile lit up on Finn's face and he nodded. "Morning Kurt, morning Blaine."

Kurt looked over to Finn's nightstand and saw the rule book. He smiled and looked at Finn. "You read it?"

"Yea," Finn said , "most of it. I was reading about Poof Cosma."

Blaine cringed at the name. Finn tilted his head.

"Poof was the last fairy baby ever born. At that time, Kurt and I were trying to have a child of our own. We had asked Sue to wish us up a baby but that was a few weeks after Poof was born and by that time, it had been outlawed."

A sad presence was suddenly in the room and Finn sagged his shoulders. "That sucks... I wish you guys could have a ba-"

Kurt lunged forward and waved his wand, more duct tape appearing on Finn's mouth. Finn tried to peel it off but it wouldn't budge.

"I'm sorry Finn, but you can't say that anymore. No more 'I wish' unless you're actually wishing for it. Okay?"

Finn mumbled up at Kurt incoherently but Kurt seemed to get the message. He waved his wand and the tape disappeared. Finn worked his jaw a bit and said "I'm sorry... Are you mad?"

Blaine gasped as if he had been personally offended and kissed Finn's forehead. "We could never be mad at you, you're our baby."

Finn smiled at the endearment as footsteps echoed in the hallway. "Oh no!" Finn shouted. "It's Santana! She's gonna see y- where'd you go?"

He looked over to the fishbowl and there were Kurt and Blaine, swimming around and looking completely normal despite the crowns and wands.

Santana broke his door down seconds later, grinning evilly. "Your parents are gone for the weekend, Frankentween. I'm in charge. I expect you to keep quiet and eat little to nothing and- since when do you have goldfish? Where did you get them?"

Finn floundered as he processed all the information. "My goldfish? Um, had them forever, you've never seen them before?"

Santana blinked a few times with a confused expression before grinning again. "Whatever. You're gonna sit in here and study or grieve or swim around in your own preteen angst all weekend. Have fun, Finnocence."

With that she was gone, slamming the door behind her and walking away singing "This Snix is on fi-yaaaaaa!"

When the footsteps faded, Kurt swam over to the edge of the bowl and held up his wand. "Want some breakfast sweetie?"

Finn nodded and smiled. "I wish I had a breakfast burrito and a big glass of milk."

With a wave of their wands, Kurt and Blaine conjured a huge burrito into Finn's lap. Finn smiled and ate, moaning at the taste. "This is the best burrito I've ever eaten."

Blaine laughed and swam into the tiny blue castle in the bowl. Kurt watched the whole time Finn ate.

"Kurt, stop being stalkerish," Finn mumbled through a full mouth. Kurt bit his lip. "I don't want you to choke."

Finn rolled his eyes and laughed softly, talking once again with his mouth full. "I've been eating my whole life and I've never choked once. Calm down, woul-"

He coughed and coughed, trying to dislodge the piece of tortilla stuck in his throat. Kurt screamed and waved his wand, and the tortilla was suddenly gone. Finn took deep breaths of air and looked over at Kurt, who was now accompanied by Blaine.

"Oh, my baby!" Kurt cried as he was suddenly on the bed, crushing Finn in a hug. "Kurt," Finn protested. "Kurt, I'm fine. Kurt, stop. Kurt."

Kurt was bustling, wiping Finn's face and looking into his mouth and clicking his tongue in an I-told-you-so way.

Blaine was still gilled, floating silently in the bowl, his neat and tidy black hair suddenly looking disheveled and old.

"Guys, I'm fine, okay! God stop treating me like I'm a baby, I'm 10 years old! I wish you guys would stop worrying!"

With a sudden loud pop, Kurt and Blaine were floating in front of him, listlessly playing go fish. Finn watched them and said "What happened? Am I hurt?"

"You shouldn't worry. We aren't," Blaine dead panned, taking a 7 from Kurt without asking. Kurt looked unfazed, taking a jack from Blaine.

Finn raised an eyebrow. "You're not worried about me?"

"Nope," Kurt said boredly, laying down a pair of twos. Finn smiled and finished his burrito, washing it down with the glass of milk. He watched them play until a few minutes later, his stomach made a terrible noise and a wave of pain spread over his whole body.

"Kurt, Blaine, it hurts!" he cried, clutching his stomach. Blaine just rolled his eyes. "Don't worry, you'll be fine."

Finn cried and clutched his stomach. He was having digestion problems and he had drank the milk way too fast. He sniffled and looked up at Kurt and Blaine. "I wish you guys worried again..."

Just like a lightswitch being flipped, the fairies were all over him, feeling his forehead and cooing soothingly and rubbing his tummy. Finn smiled softly and relaxed, thankful for the fairies as they made quick work of making him feel better.

"All better?" Blaine asked as he finished giving Finn a small bright pink and blue pill that tasted like cotton candy. Finn nodded and his eyelids drooped. He yawned and was suddenly bundled up in bed under many warm blankets, certainly the work of Kurt and Blaine.

"Thanks guys. I love you so much."

"We love you too Finny," Kurt said softly, rubbing a soft hand over his warm cheek before poofing back into the fishbowl, following Blaine into the small blue castle. Finn slept peacefully for most of the day and dreamt of adventures with Kurt and Blaine. Skiing, swimming, going to exotic places, having actual friends that cared about him... He decided that he would never take their protectiveness for granted again.


End file.
